Sunday 22 February 2015

Of God and Shooting Stars

"It's been a long time since I've seen you smile." I think to myself regularly these days, inspired by Beirut's song. You is not me, you is MUWCI.

Did I actually start believing in God last Monday, or is that too just an illusion? Did I really see my first shooting star yesterday, or did I just imagine it? Was I really explaining them how I felt about the portrayal of gender in "all about that bass" when the only light on earth was coming from the stars and from the ends of our cigarettes? I gave up on dishonesty long ago.

In three months and one day, I graduate, don't I? 

MUWCI life is complicated, yet so simple. There's a lot of appearances, but more importantly a lot of reality beneath that. There's a lot of complaining, but a lot of happiness beneath that (but a lot of depression beneath that). There's a lot of how-are-you-tired-you-too-okay-bye but there's also quite some general caring and hugs and shared tears. The sun makes it easier to get up in the morning, but harder to go to sleep in the evening.

"Who are you?" he asked.
"A wanna-be" I said.
"People always tend to undervalue themselves?"
"It's not a bad thing."

When was the last time you saw a raindrop? Does it represent tears of happiness or sadness? Quite an important question, isn't it.
The clock tells me that it's 12:11. Half of the day has already past. What are the achievements so far? Waking up? Washing my face? Moving my laptop to the classroom? Not watching TV online? Not bad.

She has plans of reading every single political journal that exists on Earth. She wants to listen to every kind of music. She wants to read all books (but not fantasy PLEASE). She wants to see all sights and smiles. Sometimes, she really wants to perform well. Sometimes, she really wants to not perform at all. A lot of dreams and ideals, but where is the real part to them? I told you, she's a wanna-be.

This blogpost is kind of the ugliest but kind of the prettiest. Like my mind maybe? Kind of beatiful, kind of disgusting.
What will it be like to go home again. What will it be like to have holidays again. What will it be like to hear people complain about their teachers again. What will it be like to bike again. What will it be like to not have a friend living on two meters from me. What will it be like to not have a kettle within a radius of ten meters at all times.

It's 12:21. I should go for brunch, second round. They have Korean pancakes.

I apologize for this post!